So I did an experiment : for a few weeks, I had been trying to take on the Natalie Portman makeup in black swan and costume to pretend to be her taking from the New York Times’ Halloween ideas. And it’s wrecking havoc on my life emotionally, psychologically and probably financially. I learned acting in my drama class before. I easily slid into the persona and personalities. I have been dreaming dreams that are not mine, talking things I don’t care about and waking up with residue heartache that are not mine ever since. It’s officially too much. So I washed off my makeup, regretted buying that tutu dress and putting away the book life of m immediately. It’s probably those strangers, powerful people and politicians celebrities trying to things up on the news and everywhere so they could hang out with me as if I’m a playboy bunny. It’s disturbing, absurd and seriously ill. I don’t want to be Natalie Portman or anybody else when I live, travel and work. No wonder people say Halloween should be taken in with only a few spoonful. Etc.